JOHN KERRY-HEINZ, GOES YACHTING AS EGYPT BURNS...

HOW JOHN KERRY-HEINZ STAYS "FULLY ENGAGED"

Man, do we have a crack secretary of state, or what? Actually, a better description might be to say that we have a secretary of state who seems to be on crack. Because, apparently, Secretary of State John Kerry-Heinz, who I believe, spent a very brief, yet very personally rewarding, time in Vietnam, spent the Fourth of July cavorting around that sun-drenched island getaway for the rich and famous, Nantucket, even as the chaos from a military takeover was rocking Egypt.

As was first reported on bostonherald.com, Kerry-Heinz, whose wife owns a house and a yacht on the ritzy retreat, was seen yesterday casually strolling about. in jeans and a light-colored polo shirt, on Federal Street out of sight from the July Fourth festivities on Main Street. And it was later that same afternoon that Kerry-Heinz was seen offloading bags from a single-person kayak to a boat in Nantucket Sound after launching from the beach behind his wife's home at 5 Hulbert Ave.

Of course Republicans were quick to pounce on the image of the vacationing secretary of state, and rightly so, using it to point out what they deem as being a big Barry "Almighty" failing, that being, of course, the inability to convey any semblance of a clear message on foreign policy on hotspots like Syria, Turkey and Egypt. Meanwhile, Kerry-Heinz’s staff were doing their best to insist the Kerry-Heinz is fully engaged and has been logging long hours and high miles. "Fully-engaged?"

According to the State Department, Kerry-Heinz is supposed to have dialed into yesterday's meeting with Barry "Almighty" and members of his national security team in the Situation Room. Kerry-Heinz also, supposedly, called foreign dignitaries from Egypt, Israel, Norway, Qatar, Turkey and the United Arab Emirates. But there's no real way to adequately determine if he actually did either. I mean, come on, all we really have to go on is the word of one his flunkies!

And then we had some Kerry-Heinz spokesbimbo by the name of Jen Psaki who actually made the claim that, "Secretary Kerry has been working tirelessly around the clock since he returned from his 10-day trip and there has not been a moment where he has not been focused on doing everything possible to communicate with his team in Washington and in Egypt, within the administration and with his counterparts around the world." Come on, does she really think we're that stupid?

Former state Democrat Party chairman Phil Johnston also attempted to provide some cover for Kerry-Heinz saying, these days the secretary of state can effectively work out of anywhere in the world. "The man’s been working 24/7 for weeks to create peace in the Middle East, I think he’s entitled to a day on Nantucket," said Johnston. "If there’s anything we know about John Kerry, it’s that he’s a very hard worker. The American people don’t need to worry about that."

Look, this is yet another example of just how far in over his head Kerry-Heinz is in his new position. As a senator from Massachusetts the effects of his stupidity could be somewhat limited because there were another 99 senators who could, to some degree, dilute it. As secretary of state his rabid stupidity can be seen as being a bit more dangerous. Because as creepy as this is to visualize, in many situations this goof is seen as being the face of the United States. Fight off the urge to puke!